JECKHORE

Disappointment

2010-02-27T01:11:00.000+08:00

Fiasco[Fee-as-koh or Fee-ah-koh]
(noun)A complete failure
I have been striving for a lot of things
There is always a polite smirk with a slight shake of the head
Well that is the most polite way of hurting someone
Why do we need to know what is what
Why do we need to have the mindset of right and wrong
Wrong can be right to "WRONG" person
Right can be Wrong too
I am saying in my perception of what is right we should be diverse
Accept anything will whole hearted
If someone were to kill you
Just know that it is the right thing to accept the situation
In my perception of a this world
Is that there is not a word called NO
If you were to know me
I always say yes
We do not need anyone to stop us from doing what we think is right
We will learn
The only one that can stop me is GOD

First Impression

2010-02-26T01:10:00.000+08:00

I recalled my mother saying
"Son, you look better with short hair!"
Well, this is what I told her
If I were to look good
People will get a chance to get to know just because
Of the first impression
Lets say if I look like an average Joe and surrounded by the member of the public
Consist of 10 ugly, 10 average, 10 good looking
How many out of 100 people will want to get to know me?
Well, this is a social experiment I have not tested out
By my hypothesis will be
No one will get to know you unless you're are one of the 2 extremes; not in between

New Haircut

2010-02-25T01:09:00.000+08:00

My mother has been pestering me to get a haircut
But seriously I know that I need it
Because I look damn untidy
The main reason that I kept it medium length
Is so that I can get a nicer haircut
You see
When they cut your hair
The snips does not makes your hair grow longer
It gets shorter
So the only way they could go is UP, Up, Up and Up!
So in my theory
We could reduce the risk of getting a bad haircut by having long hair

Rush

2010-02-24T17:49:00.002+08:00

Finally have mixed songs for the Danceworks 2010!
Yes Man!
I am joining Danceworks!
Major conflicts coming up
But I am not putting more noses in the conflict
And strictly concentrate in the dance off
I wonder why do we need to say NO!
I mean we can always compromise so that there will be a win win situation
I do not understand this at all
Furthermore, we have more things in our hands than ever..
Besides the point
I am going to go for a more informative approach in my next post

I am trying Bboy

2010-02-19T16:27:00.000+08:00

After learning a bunch of style
This noob dancer is losing his Bboy groove
How can a Toprock looked like House or Reggae?
Damn!
I have to fucking learn already!
Well, most of us know that if we think something is fun it is fun
So, I did
I fooled myself into thinking that Bboy is fun
Don't get me wrong
Bboy is fun
When you are in the groove with the music
It is less fun when you are learning choreography....
Typical?
But I kept telling myself it is like learning house or locking!
Everything needs a foundation.
So, yeah...
This is my foundation.
Hate it or love it.
It will be useful.

Dance starts now!

2010-02-18T16:22:00.000+08:00

CityAlive 2010 is around the corner
As much as I love to be in it
I am scared of the party
Well I am a wuss of alcohol if you know me
Alcohol=Vomit
That is my theory
After past experiences
I have seen my friends Vomit and do insane stunts
With a bottle of alcohol in their hands
Going wild turkey; so they called it
After an experience
I do not want to go back that path
Because I love my life
Although it sucked
I love my life cause it sucked
Unlike those guys who have a perfect life

Boredom rhymes with Freedom

2010-02-17T16:16:00.002+08:00

When we actually came across boredom
We are filled with multiple constraints
Such as space, activities and solitaire
But do we know that these constraints helps us work best?
We work well with constraints
Working under pressure with people telling us
What to do
What not to do
What is right
And what is wrong
Well, boredom is when we do what is right
Freedom is when we do what we perceive to be right
(At least for us)
Boredom will not kill us
Fight for your freedom!

I thought you knew

2010-02-15T13:15:00.003+08:00

Most of us would just say things that we want
There is a fraction of us that want things to be read by the signs
We want things to be read off our minds
Then we came to scenario of "I thought you'd knew?"
Anyway.....
I guess its over
It was a little too late
We are the fool again
We could never do what we do with them anymore

We should stop being a fool.

Bounded by appearance

2010-02-14T13:05:00.000+08:00

As much as we say "its the heart that counts"
It is still not true
I understand that I have a face of monster
And a mind of "LADY GAGA"
Everyone would be friends with me
But never get into me
The only ones that they get into
Is the guys who have the face and the hot bods

I once said to a friend
Some people earn their way into life
Some people was born their way into life
Like a case of a blank paper and a still painting in the museum
The blank paper always wins although the effort is minimal

Not a Day too Happy

2010-02-13T12:53:00.003+08:00

Lets talk metaphorically now

I would not want you to know that I am talking about you
As this is my expression of my heart

The sheep jumps joyfully and the shepherd is too, joy, that the sheep is overjoyed
Honestly, the shepherd is
But the shepherd is crushed as the sheep is not his
The sheep runs to its master
The shepherd and the master are friends
The shepherd do not want to steal the sheep away from the master
As it would be deciding what the sheep wants
Instead of the sheep deciding itself
....................

Enough is enough

2010-02-10T21:27:00.002+08:00

Why would I have this emotions which always will be triggered whenever I see you and him
Jealousy? or mainly your attention have diverted.
I should stop hoping
I should stop
I should!
I am really mad at myself for having these feelings.
If only I am not human and have no feelings and emotions
I would live a boring but perfect life with only objectivity
I would kill anyone that is in between me and my goals.
It would not be wrong even if I say it is.

When it ends....

2010-01-25T20:18:00.003+08:00

We came to ourselves
Realising the similarities we have upon each other
We grow apart
After so long knowing
I really understood what they perceive as Love

On a side note
It may be me feeling as though some guy
Is actually stealing my swag
I swear to god
It is my hardwork for me to put on this concept
And for you to go around stealing
I have to come up with new one
I fucking hate you
And my swag is not the only thing that you stole
You know what I mean!

The Joke is On You!

2010-01-21T22:20:00.002+08:00

A lot of thing have been happening without me update this journal of mine.
Jive is finally over.
Well I did not perform.
I wanted to.
But....
Lets just leave X as the unknown.
Besides the point.
I am already 18.
I have been invited to clubs and to non-underaged activities which I am not interested of.
As I would not want to be influenced.

The thing to highlight on this post is that
I am in the middle of 2 families
One bitchy towards the other
I am disappointed on how both families react towards each other.
How I wish they could remain friends.
Well as part of life, you may not know when we need each other
Be nice everybody
When I die
I want this world to be much more peaceful that now.
If not I will still live.

Stop being such a Bitch

2010-01-10T15:54:00.003+08:00

Again...
A few days before my birthday..
I am sick...
6 years in a row.
I guess this sickness shares the same birthday as me.
I was super late for attendance taking yesterday and Grace was super pissed with me.
Okay I said sorry.
Up close.
However, I do feel upset for her treating me this way.
Well, most of the seniors is different when talking to me
But I try to think of the positive
Like maybe I am just those kind of person which they just cannot get along
Because I felt that way before
So I think I know
If you hate me, that is your business
I do not need to know
Cause it just hurt me this much
Thank you for not letting me know!

Shredding my face inch at a time

2010-01-04T15:45:00.002+08:00

Secrets of me is being dug out of their graves
Why cannot it be left dead?
The first day of school is...
OKAY...
Bored as hell
Because the module today is about thinking about thinking
Just as I thought my life is getting wonderful...
Leave me alone
I am not as proportional as you think
I am heavier on the left
I am lighter on the right
Longer on the top
Shorter at the bottom
Does my past matter?
I doubt so!

2010

2010-01-03T20:13:00.002+08:00

So yes!
I am back to blogging!
2009 has been a great joyride and dick sucking bad day!
As from now
I can officially say
I am not interested in LOVE
and am happy for an open relationship
More to Polyamory now...
So for the ass whipping part
I am more determined
I speak from the heart and not from the brain
I hope everyone can support me on my journey
I have a big surprise for you in the year 2013
There is Something called SHARK ATTACK!
Have a look out..
Coming up is a blog also called the Shark Attack
It is a fashion blog that helps you to be more IN
The aim is to create an awareness of Street Fashion
And also for my fellow designer friends that are looking for references
Or rather INSPIRATION!
Avant Garde!
Keep a look out.
Shark has a new purpose in life
Have you got yours?

BORING!

2009-12-23T14:04:00.002+08:00

Holidays are tiring
No one ask me out!
I feel damn depressed
Help me
Give me free MONEY!
LIKE PLEASE!

Holiday

2009-12-15T14:28:00.003+08:00

Holidays are here
Time for another break until another term starts
I cannot wait to go to year 2
When term starts
I am going to countdown 5 weeks
Until then I am still deprived of rest
In year 2, every Wednesday is an off day
In earnest, I need rest
Thanks holiday

So back to reporting what happened recently for the short posts
Firstly, I have a pack schedule
I was not ready for it but it came to help me experience something new
I am very much greatful for it
Secondly, my new crib does not have a fucking internet connection
Hence, I have to blog in school and skip RJs
I am trying to make my time during the holidays meaningful
This are the few people I want to go out with

Kelly, Mashita, Mastura, Seok Hui, Haiqal, Iris, Fara, Raizal, Cherie, Isya, Zhi Wen.

Small list?
I only got 3 weeks.
I think
Minus off dance practises
Minus off "secret stuff"
I am telling you time is precious
We have to make full use of it

2012 is COMING!
fucking REPENT PEOPLE!

Fuck it!

2009-12-11T21:21:00.001+08:00

Talk to me
I look away
Hoping you will come closer
But you did not
I don't blame you
Cause I know
I just need time to find a new "best friend"
Until I do
Its hard for me to talk to you
Remembering the things....

Performance

2009-12-08T21:16:00.002+08:00

So today was my performance
I did my best
But I still think I can improve much
I feel depressed when actually
I am supposed to be celebrative
I am dead and gone
Fuck this whole shit
You and you and me
We could have threesome someday
Really laughed my ass fucking off
Another case of opportunity turned away
Only I know what I am talking about
You are probably reading this

Just Forever
Mind body and soul

Super Tired

2009-12-06T01:25:00.003+08:00

Once....
A man told me
I would learn better when I push myself when I am tired
I know I have tried it today I am happy
But I am helplessly struggling to improve
My stiffness have to go soon
I am so fucking bumped for myself
Too bad
Something are just way too precious to be taken a risk for
Pulling the trigger
Is just too tempting
But it involves a sacrifice
Would you be my sacrifice?
I want to see blood

I am to be blame again

2009-11-26T01:37:00.002+08:00

I am not upset
I am just expressing how I felt
I know you did not meant to hurt me
Neither do I
We fly high
We fell low
You probably would not understand
I am not the same as my friends
I could not believe the trust barrier we have with each other
I come I act I go
That is how I do it in future
Kind of looking at the bright side
I am happy that the stiffness is going away
But I am still stiff
8th December stiffness gonna go!

What a week?!

2009-11-22T01:09:00.002+08:00

The week ended off with a high note
Ended up partying as hell
If I could DJ, I would
Pretty much
We enjoyed ourselves despite the music
Just because we are there to help each others experience a lifetime
I love the whole process of everything
Took pictures as usual
It is up on my FaceBook
Its too much of a night to call it a day

P.S. We have finished 2:10 mins of a Performance set.
Maybe you could watch us at W1 on 8th December 2009

The Confession

2009-11-16T22:56:00.002+08:00

2012 was an OKAY movie
No innovation
Very predictable
Go watch it to know it
Marley and Me is my all time favourite

I got a pretty weird feeling when I am in deep or moderate conversation with
These sum of people
Were all of you hinting?
It is weird that all are not like one or the other
Neither are they close to each other
Stop trying to help me build this telepathic path between us
I am no good in understanding the signs and hints
As for this thing I am the most ignorant one

I have been too absent-minded

2009-11-15T15:47:00.002+08:00

All I want to say is
Never have I seen this much commitment
I am speechless
We are progressing like nobody's business
And here we are still trying to without making any effort
Why can't everything be right
Why?
Obviously the childish one is you.
Thank you for making me understand who are you
And who am I.
Can I change group?
I know its too late
But who cares.
They made me feel used
They made me feel like a GULLIBLE person
I am very very disappointed...

You Motivated Me

2009-11-12T00:48:00.003+08:00

Looking at my crew mates performing
I am so inspired to improve my skills
I need to further soften up my body
I need to do isolation
I need to improve
I do not know why
I give my self till the end of the month to soften up
Latest by the end of next month
I want to dance like a pro
So that I would not be too self-concious

Bounded

2009-11-11T13:05:00.002+08:00

I feel the need to be free
The need to BOOMSZ
Why I could not try to break free
Some people thinks that they are seriously right
When there a thousand of possible ways
Why I could not think one way
It may be easier to feel the same way as them

Keep your comments....

2009-11-11T10:07:00.002+08:00

I designed......
Digging my own grave with the words that I have said
Did not realised a single word that I have said
I know sorry would not cut it
I just felt terrible
Because it is unlike me
I blame myself for letting people hurt me and not do anything
Now I know the monster they have created
Glad to know it
You are whoever said
Speak up for yourself to win
I say
Silence do not means defeat
I win in the end
You prove you are guilty
To apologize is always better than walking away
Knowing that you did something wrong.

I do not let POLITIX

2009-11-08T02:20:00.002+08:00

Some criticisms are constructive
Others are just pulling you down
Trying to test you
I would not quit dancing
Nor would I quit the IG
There is no problem I cannot handle
I believe that this episode is making me strong
Making me feel that I have been through it
I would not stop
Even if you want me to
If my presence irks you
The solution is you
Either you go or you change
I tried to change
I tried my best
And you speculate rumors
I am not going to quit
Nor will I shout to tell the whole world what a person you are
I am just keeping silent
Train myself
Silence does not means defeat
I will win
I will deliver a good show
I may stay professional
Thank you My fucking Loathers...

I am SHAG

2009-11-06T08:46:00.002+08:00

I felt like sleeping through the day
I do not know why I am so fucking shag
How I wish everything is as soft as cotton
Like my seat
Like my desk
Like my laptop
Like the ceiling
Like the floor
Like the wall
I want everything to be made up of cotton
I have dry skin on face
I feel like I lack of sleep
PLEASE!!
Help me!

I just need time

2009-11-04T13:12:00.002+08:00

Why would one not understand that I need time to readjust myself
I know I should not be running away
You said that our team lacks leadership
He said Leadership should come from the leader
If I am a bad leader
Why is there meetings, notifications, updates
You said that I am immature
I asked you which part
You said the energetic part
Do you want me to be lethargic as a leader?
You said I need to be more firm
Does it mean you'll be hating me?
How can I be lethargic and firm at the same time.
Wait Creative Concept
Contrast
Contrast is not always good you know
Good eye opener
Keeps me going
Know who is good who is bad
Seriously
You know it untill you feel it for yourself
RETRIBUTION!

2009-11-02T21:08:00.002+08:00

I am back from the long run of practices.
Will be busier in the future to come
First on 22nd November we will be having another performance
On December is my Debut Showcase
So I have a lot of practising to do.
Muse: Opening was a great fun
I wish to improve myself more
Stop telling me to take classes
Because I sucked at choreographies
I like to do things freely
But I am not that shallow
I am actually a broad person
Tons of problems came in my way
Just like that on one day
I managed to compose myself
Because some are big, some are small
They are not life threatening
They are not death
I wonder again
But I know for sure
My absence will not be an impact for many
Or perhaps
For all
It only predicts sorrow to my family
And that is for a few
And after that
Who is Shark?
Nobody knows him
Cause he is just too complicated of an average man.

Apparently

2009-10-23T01:28:00.002+08:00

Anticipating for a post?
Update you busy asses with my life
I have an upcoming unsure performance this 29th October.
I have an extra ticket for those who want to tag along for 10th November
I have a tentative ticket taken on 11th November

Apparently I am busy with shows after practices after training.
I have to polish my Bboying
Because, I do not want to feel empty
Goal set by me....
By the end of....
This week: Perfected Headstand
Next Week: Perfected Handstand
The following week: Perfected air-chair
The week after: Perfected windmill
Weekend will be solely based on Down rhythm, popping and choreographing for fun.

I hate fucking stiffies
Who say I am fucking stiff
Because you should correct yourself before correcting me
I hate fucking people that think thay are too good for the crew
If can do better be instructor uh!
Mother fucker.
Hope your var jay jay rot with maggots lingering in it.

Been coming to school late and been skipping classes.
My friend had a busted lip
It looks pretty bad
I hate the pain although it looks kinda good
You know how much we love pain when we anticipate it

Tired

2009-10-16T23:59:00.002+08:00

I am dead beat from the training and all
I hope it is worth while
I am finally getting rest this weekend
Until next weekend which we have an intensive training
I am telling you
It have been a great day
A great experience
And now I am tired of it
Tired of the fun
I just want to sleep
Can I just do that for 2 days?

Take credits....

2009-10-15T21:49:00.002+08:00

I gave the worst evaluation I could ever give
I am so fucking bad
This is what you will get for not participating
And take credits for whatever I said
Get a brain for you penis sake
To come and think of it
Why do you even come
First I feel used
Second I feel imitated
Third I felt that you deserve a D at least
Because I did not know what you did
Besides watching lame ass Anime
I want to change team for all I care

Stop Dancing

2009-10-14T23:56:00.002+08:00

At this moment of time
I need your attention
I no longer have to dance to express
I have to impress you
So that I get your attention
I hate it when someone is best in a way
You are good to them
Idiots who are learning like me
You put me down
Karma always have its way to get back
Just you wait
What you made me feel
Will be what you will go through in the future
Except it would be 100 times worse

Just.............

2009-10-13T23:17:00.003+08:00

Drove back was not usual
I pondered
Why am I moving
Why is the air cold
Why is there another man sitting beside me
I tried to figure
But I could not even figure myself
To figure the act of nature
We explore the deep Atlantic
We go beyond Earth and Mars
We explore the external
And others
Not realising that
It is us that were undiscovered and unexplored
We look so far
Not even understanding a shit load of ourselves
I do know what am I to believe
Whenever you are
I stop myself to prevent this
Response to happen
I break away
Trying to be
I would not want this friendship
To fucking end
Just cause I am naive and risk-taking
Just cause I want thing as perfect as it seem now
I want to feel the urge to talk to you and feel departed from you
I like where we at now
I hope friends we are
If we were to get serious
It would be when we are serious
I am not referring to you but you.
Don't fucking get it?
Shove chopsticks up your ass....

Love is just a feeling when you are excited to see someone
Love can and will end when we are done exploring each other
What comes after is not love
But objectivity......

I am sick

2009-10-11T17:34:00.002+08:00

Nowadays
I have been feeling rather unwell
Who cares
But it is really tiring
Having to struggle up
Walk
To school or to anywhere
I would still do chores
Cause no one will care if I am sick
I am scared
Really scared
I found something
A really something
I do not want it
Please go away...

What a day...

2009-10-08T23:25:00.002+08:00

So today was photography
And we have to do some stupid shots
And I really came out with a stupid concept shot
Well I really learnt a bit at most
Watched the preview
I gave support to them
If the need any
I come to realise that I do not dance for the fame
Unlike those
Who die hard just to get a role in the performance
What keeps me going is
To level up my skills
And just enjoy the moment
I do not need to be noticed
I just need to express
I am not a dancer!
What I do is art...
I am an Artist.
Please differentiate.
Word advise for those who complain about others without realising themselves
We shall stop talking about others unless we do the same
So if you are the same with them....
By all means complain!

Well look what we got here

2009-10-08T00:17:00.002+08:00

So not way to illustrate how I feel in a visual form
But if you prefer verb form
Here it goes

Expect the world to be perfect
And it will not
Expect me to be "one way"
And it will not
We just have to accept the fact that life do not go our way
Well I expect originality from every individual
And everything turns out to be
The same
Why do we fear risk
Take on it
If you fail
You know how to improve
If you succeed
You will feel good about it
My facilitator says that I am a passionate writer
I express my state of mind the moment I write
I doubt there is truth in that
But if it is
I look through it again
And found out that I freely express emotions and strong opinion
Never mind that
I am the smallest in the class
I bet no one knows my deepest darkest secret
I am glad
Thank you
Gratitude shown for reading the verbal floods

Becoming a TWIG

2009-10-06T23:57:00.002+08:00

I skipped all my meals
Fuck!
I skipped everything
Its not that I want to
It is just that it happened to be that way
I have vomited in school for 2 consecutive days
Today
I coiled my body as I vomited
But there was nothing
Just a mere hurl and....
It was too weakening to say
Then I went TRCC to eat alone
Friends just happens to be somewhere important
I bought my food
Get a seat
And I felt like vomiting again
So I went spitting and feeling bad about myself
I came back
My food was gone
Damn!
The uncle clear it off
All he can say is sorry
Damn him!
I bet if I curse him...
He will die
So I would not
And P.S I twisted my ankle while hip hop
What a DAY!
On another note
I am what I wear so they say...

Damn

2009-10-06T10:13:00.002+08:00

Am I really that different
I thought I would be surrounded with the same kind
With the similar ideas
With the similar literature
I was surprised by how it actually turn out to be
I miss when there were times that I said something
And they understood where I am coming from
I miss Art Class in school
Well I guess I was blessed to be in a school where they aided me
For days like this
Not that this is bad
I was just disappointed
Not having to see
People that have the same ideology as me
Is that difficult to find?
Am I really that different?

OMFG!

2009-10-05T22:34:00.002+08:00

I am surprised the condition of my level
Like seriously
Almost everyone knows everyone
Good?
I hold the answer in a few
School was great
Despite having the thought that the fucking facilitator who does not listen to
This wannabe!
I proved myself at the very last moment when my team is sort of confused
I am glad that I helped
They were all so leading
I followed to avoid some things that happened in the past
Just rock it out Art-Farts
Need a sleep
Need to meet them guys tomorrow
Fuck you bitch!

LUB is disgusting SLANG!

2009-10-05T09:27:00.002+08:00

Topic is on love
Is this a sign of something
I doubt so
Everyone in RP is doing it someday or the other
So it is not a sign
I am down with fucking bad facilitator which ignores me
Totally pissed...

School!

2009-10-04T21:28:00.002+08:00

Speaking off my mind
I need to be solitary
I need to be without you
Only I can know how it is
To be missing you
As empty as we thought a matter is
It will never be
As saturated we thought our mind is
It will never be true
We cannot runaway from the fact that our life is ever-changing
Today, I cherish your presence
We can never be sure if the present I can say the same
We live for every moment
It is our job to always keep the delusional feeling exist every second
For you and for me
The leap of faith is a big risk
You either end up successful or failing miserably
I prefer us to be friends with strong feelings for each other
Than to end as enemies as a cause of the delusional love
We will let nature takes its cause
If we are meant to be
This friendship will change....

Pain in the neck

2009-10-03T23:37:00.003+08:00

All's well that ends well
All's unfortunate that ends unfortunate
The day was streaming without buffering
It was almost ideal
I feel that I cannot stand being here anymore
When I am out
I feel free
As though a prisoner, let go
I met Shit and Kel
What more to ask during a weekend
I clearly miss those times
That I have the thought exactly
And it can be relate to my two best friends
When I am home
Aunt told me that I choose friends
And it is a bad thing
I find that it is for my own good
Even my sis agree
Which makes matter worst
Nobody understands the way I feel
By choosing she meant
By not having TYPICAL MALAY FRIENDS!
I shove my penis up your ass and make sure I transmit STD to you!
I do not wish to go on any further in this house
I want to go back HOME!
I want to feel like everything is well again
I want to see my cat!
I am way beyond tears and suicidal thoughts
Suicide is just too shallow
I wish I can pitch a tent and stay near EAST COAST
ALONE!
How I wish everyone can understand my state of mind
I am a living dead creature covered with punishing words
To pull myself down to the concrete grey floor
I thought your hand could help
However it did not
Only did I realise I am drowning
In a pool of your unpleasant words of surprise
Which I thought I could rely on
You are unpredictable
I would stop
I would stop
I would....

Forget it

2009-10-02T22:25:00.003+08:00

A new semester is drawing nigh
I could not care much about it
I know trouble always have no problems finding me
Expressing myself through dance
Although I want to stop
I keep getting back dancing
Well I basically sucked
But I feel that that is how I can express myself
Without anyone knowing the meaning behind it
They know the emotions
But they do not know why
And they thought I am just choreographing
Its a way of expression

Art is freedom of speech made invisible.

I dreamt

2009-10-01T23:51:00.002+08:00

A garden so perfect
Marshmallow white little creature
Bouncing off the green well trimmed grass field
I saw many fishing
I saw many dazing
None of sight of frown nor sulk
I see only happy faces
I almost felt not waking up
It was as real as real can get

In another one
It is another garden
But this time the trees were exotic
The hills were adventurous
I was there with my bestfriend
At least I treat him as a bestfriend
Drops of waves touched the surface of my toes
At where I was standing
We were almost 10 feet or higher off the ground
It was a cliff

I miss these dreams
The only time I felt that
I got no worries
No end
Everything is just one way
I do not need to make decisions
Decisions that will change my fate
A beautiful garden dreamt
Awaiting for the Garden of Eden
The place I would be free
Art is the only place where you have no boundaries

I Am Not Dead Yet

2009-09-30T23:28:00.002+08:00

I think I am suffering from Bipolar Disorder
Our emotions are something that we cannot have control of
Even if we can
It keeps coming back haunting
I have mood swings
I feel depress
Even though I know everything in my life is fine
Once I thought I have control of my life
Now
I wait for every individual
To predict my life
I want to feel free
Like how I felt when I bungee
Feeling almost suicidal
Almost free
I am depressed
Only time will heal this sorrow
These sorrows that came
Without reasons
Without me understanding the cause

Doctor Doctor
Please
Would you prescribe me something

On hiatus

2009-09-13T23:25:00.000+08:00

Sorry motherfuckers
I have to get some air

Hello!

2009-09-12T00:40:00.004+08:00

The song sounds hilariously genius about the gays
I am super exhausted with all the breaking and hip hop
I need to blast the speakers
And free myself
Dancing to a choreography
Is like trying to lift your hand when it is tied
I need freedom
Life do not suck
For your information
In my absolute opinion
Life do not suck
It is them who made it suck
Get control over your life
But not too much
Or else you will not be trusting nature
Get a grip
Get over it

Feminine

2009-09-11T01:10:00.002+08:00

Going crazy
Going insane
Going berserk
Hopefully not
I am not disclosing my new project

I am doing something fresh
Something about news
I am no pro
But it is worth to try

I just need to rest nowadays
Too much thoughts will just make my mind explode
My verbs are too shallow
The feeling sucks when you have no words to think about
As you are too damn tired of being busy
Just so you would not be home

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo

2009-09-10T01:35:00.002+08:00

Putting our heart and soul to something can be ultra tiring
If the odds are against you
The strongest one
The weakest one
Despite exerting the most effort
There is no way that we can move
If everyone is a cemented on the floor
I could concentrate
I could go with you
I could, I could
But would you move us there?

Night Market
She is the one that actually made me realise Love alone is not credible
But I still like the feeling of just saying "Hi" back to her
Gone were those days
Where we bit each other
Where we made each other cry just to see each other cry
Damn....
I miss seeing you cry
I know we cannot
Just cause
Of our maternal History
You are like honey
You will not turn bad
You will crystalise
In a time of no bother
And melt
Whenever I'm there

Happy onlayyyyyyyyyyyyy
I am delusional by the way

Undisclosed Desires-Muse

2009-09-09T01:08:00.002+08:00

I am happy
Not because I am having this headache
Not because I had a wonderful time
Well maybe partly that of
What is more important is that
MUSE came out with another new song
Britney Spears sang live
The Most Breaking News Of The Year
So today is the eight8
So in tradition
We have to do something
Loser got owned
Better luck trusting next time
My headache is taking this post way too short
Sorry for disappointing any of you
My life is not that fair
And neither is yours

What are you doing?

2009-09-08T00:57:00.003+08:00

Have you ever asked this questions to yourself?
Why do I read other people's blog when I do not even have one?
Why do I read this blog when I know that I hate the blogger?
How did this post seemed so exciting when it is the same content as the other awful looking blog?
And the most ultimate question
What is blog for?
Why do you blog?
Blog are here for many right reasons
But some mainly use it for
Popularity, money and complains
Not that it is bad
But just so you know and try to think about it

I state my purpose of Jore.blo
Depending on what happened on the day
Boring day, I would just blog about random stuff
Random but INFORMATIVE
On a fun day, it would just be freedom of memories keep sake
Just for me to know
On another negative day, it will be just self-reflection and others' shoe reflections
I would seldom be biased
Even if it seem like it
I am seldom
But I have my biased party people
Till then

WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR BLOG FOR?
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING WITH 3-5 Sentences?

If this questions bothers you every time
It is time to open your eyes and mind your own business
Not everything is about you

Subjective

2009-09-06T23:12:00.000+08:00

What is nice can be ugly
What is perfect can be a mistake
Have it ever crossed your minds that some things are different from each other
What if we all think a like
Will there be any problems?
Will there be any contradictions?
I question why do we want to take control of everything(well mostly)
Why is it difficult to let it be?
A control freak we all are
We mistaken humans for robots
And ourselves as the remote
We confuse ourselves between trusting fate and getting control of our life
At the end of the day
The only one you can control is you
No, not your husband, not your dog, not your car.
YOU!

It just occurred to me that we prefer someone because we got already got something from them
Trust, Money, Advice, Understanding and....
LOVE~**roll eyes**
We are all victims and selfish people
We use each other for our benefits
Disagree as you may
The only difference is your intention
Is it good or bad
Know your role

That is life

2009-09-05T17:05:00.000+08:00

Had a hardcore Sims session
I pretty much modified sims 3 in every aspects
Created new Sim creature to begin with
Fuck god!
I am going to make him gay man!
I just found out that there is such a thing as gay marriage in Sims 3
And I have the same-sex pregnancy!
Like what!
So I guess by having them as preggers I will know who's giving and who's receiving..
Who's on top and who's down below
Who's in control and who's enjoying the show
Laughing my ass of when I got to know this
Kudos to SIMS 3!

How many people?

2009-09-04T23:44:00.000+08:00

A morning wake to school
Getting to wake up early for hip hop
Can sometimes be an unpleasant thing to do
It somehow goes to show that you are going to be early
Despite warnings and signs to show how much you prefer punctuality
It still sums up to the same old thing
So people out there
It is better to be late for a leisure meeting or something something
Because there will always be an innocent life later than you
That is for those who hates to wait
Until now
My team is not progressing into the choreography
My ideas are way too boring for them
So I will sit back
And enjoy the show
As team mates desire the strong feeling of closure and team spirit
My team have not been at the top for attendance
The show must go on
With or without
Preferably with
What for wait for those who cannot
What for wait for those ideas where you got a very own mature brains to think
I fret that my team will bite some steps
Relying too much on each other is not ideal
Something may surface
So it is wise to be quite independent
At the same time take in what others have
Audition was super tough
Not my forte
So I kind of slacked
Dinner with my favorites in hip hop
Although they do not know me well
I sure know them
Being the most unpredictable has its advantage
Nobody can read you
Despite trying hard
Looking attentive can seem to be looking confused
Looking happy can seem to be looking excited
Laughing can seem to be sarcastic
Whatever you do, don't try this at home

P.S. Vulgarities are way too common now. I should stop using it.
DOUBLE P.S. Want to blog your life away? Try not to use my style. You know what I mean.

Iris

2009-09-03T23:55:00.000+08:00

The fact is you are gone
Your tears were not signs of goodbye
But a sign of a settle dear friendship
We will miss you
I am sure you will miss me the most
But try not to alright...

So today was a rather
Errands day
The fact that sister and aunt made a huge quarrelsome feud over somethings each other said
Girls will not stop being girls
Their ovaries are program to function like wise
Then met Shit in Boon Lay
Ended up that it failed
Then tried calling this guy
I think I gave him 18 missed calls
I wanted to wake him up to accompany me to Changi Airport
At the end he was super late
I got charged overtime train ride fee
Small matter
The I realise this girl giving Social Studies note to her friend
Well the sample essays have no conclusion
Conclusions are a way to distinguish an A student from the rest
Well it is her way...
Changed to our attire
And met Iris
Iris feels so sad
............
Went Yishun to bowl
In the end
Did not
So our main purpose to Yishun is to eat Burger King
Thank you
Sin Seok Hui Sophia!

I can do anything

2009-09-02T22:23:00.000+08:00

Woke up late
I was so shocked myself
It has been 3 nights since I slept correctly
I was happy that I got the rest
Met Shita
It was super hilarious
We wanted to install Adobe Master Collection into her laptop
Appears to be the whole program setup took way too long
That the battery died down
So meeting her tomorrow again to get it installed
Maybe guide her a bit
She is not that noob uh
I like her carousel
I really would love to have a ride and spin on that thang~
Just being pervy..
Happens to be annoyed by everything at home
But...

Friend....
If you can beat whatever is bothering
It shows that you can beat it again
If you lose this time
Find a way to pick it up
Life is not about how high you go
It is about how you pick yourself up right of where you fell
Stay down and you be there forever
Climb up and you be somewhere
Better yet...
It is easier said
Than done...
But it is worth to try

Thank you

2009-09-02T20:39:00.000+08:00

Goodbye is bitter
A hundred and thirty seven days of knowing
Appears to be too early to assume our depth
Friends, we are
A companion so fine, you are
As the day draws nearer
I feel that having you; go so far away
Is devastating
It is so sad to imagine you, give your waves
To those of yours
What more watching the plane
Cross overhead
A true friend you are
Thank you for the times

We can't stop your departure
Neither can I stop myself from feeling so weak

I know...
You going is not eternal
But it seemed so
Another friend gone so far

Bad Omen

2009-09-02T13:28:00.002+08:00

Ever stumble upon a bad feeling?
Feeling you felt something bad is happening?
Feeling someone close to you is suffering?
I believe in premonition and visions bullshits
Never have I thought of experiencing it
Call me a fake or whatever
I know what I saw
I thought it was a thought
But when I called you
I know it was real
A bad omen
Is never to be avoided

A cure

2009-09-01T23:23:00.000+08:00

Went dinner with Seok
After making a decision not to go for hip hop
Damn!
I could have been in muse
Dick head
They were auditioning for some shit
Had a few words with my team mate at home
They were cooperative
Lets see how things go on Friday

I was too afraid to sleep tonight
I was too frighten if I get to see you again
I was too shocked to feel the way
Please don't...
Why does it always happen

Disappointed

2009-09-01T17:12:00.002+08:00

As far as the progress of my team go...
I felt that every move is mainly an effort of 3 or less
Much expectation is just way overrated
I am not pushing
Neither am I expecting much
I just want the fucking attendance to be full
Even my voice is not heard in this air
Everyone feel so important
It is like so many bosses and so little employee
I wonder what happens if I get really angry?
P.S. The team is not even moving an inch.

I am confused

2009-08-31T23:47:00.002+08:00

It makes 2 singles to make 2
Woke up kind of late to get ready for the Ice Skating Trip
I missed those days where Ice-skating is cheap and not dreadful
I thought there was going to be a whole Village to come
But in the end it is us four AGAIN!
Ice skating was rather not up to my standard
I prefer Fuji Ice Palace
Nevertheless
We manage to pull through 2 hours of our lives for it
I felt that
If the rink was bigger
If the ice was smoother
It would be more fun
Ended up shuttle bus-ing to Marina Barrage
To chill-lax
Broke our fast at Marina Square
KFC have never tasted this good
Just cause I am hungry
I found so many things today
My friend can be a drunkard
My friend can be a Homo
My friend can be a Muscle-addict
My friends can be the one that make my head spin right round

Somethings are better left unsaid
To tell you that I am disappointed
To tell you that I am not transparent
To tell you the most distinct features of ourselves
To tell you just this
Seem so impossible

Weird Is it not

2009-08-31T12:01:00.000+08:00

Last night
I had another experience again
I thought I saw you
But you were not
No you were not there
You rushed out of my way
Leaving me lying there
Just froze
I am not able to move
Sleep Paralysis
Am I too tired?
Am I too stressed?
Am I?
Narcolepsy?
Lucid Dream?
I moved my eyes
My body seemed immobilised
Panic Panic Panic
I hope it is not another visit
From an old Friend...

Go Go Go!

2009-08-30T23:05:00.000+08:00

Fuck yeah man!
Fucking blogger is back on track
Nast!
Watched Final Destination 4 today...
It was the worst of Final Destination History
Of final destination
But it is one of the best gore movie this year
Orphan was better though
It was a quick movie
An hour plus
But I like the creativity
Although it is minimal
The actors are rather bad
if there is Ali Larter again..
It would be great
But she died...
In the past Final Destination
Have to finish my Mix by Tuesday
And guess what you fathersuckers
I am done with it
Over!!!
I shall start choreographing
Although this noob ass no nothing about shaking bootays
Or B-boying
Seriously...
I do not know
I just join hip hop to learn.
Peace fathers and mothers- TO BE!

No WAY!

2009-08-29T23:10:00.000+08:00

Some of you may know
That Oasis have broke up
I feel so bumped
I teenage years of listening to their songs
Like!!!
Hope that Noel get a solo career
Nonetheless
My day filled with action packed boredom
Have to save some dime
To fill me through 31st and the stuff
The only rink that is available in Singapore
Is the Kallang Ice World
I feel that it is expensive..
$16.50 for 2 hours, skates applied
I remember those days which it was only $10 for a whole day there
There is no group discounts
Damn...
Jurong's Fuji Ice Palace
Have closed down I guess
Unless someone wants to go check it out

Someone's walking behind you

2009-08-29T15:11:00.000+08:00

As astounding the night can be
I was bored in the earlier
I do not know what is wrong
Well maybe I know
Just that too much mandarin orange
But who cares
While everyone get their dosage
I was reluctantly happy to save myself
I must comment on our noob asses to manage a small pit fire
Well it did died down
But it is an effort
It was kind of boring
I shall say
I have to entertain myself to enjoy the nightfall
On the beach
Wondering if there is people on that other side who felt the same way
I felt on this night
I kicked ball all by myself
Though there was different people trying to play with
I entertain myself to watching kids mumble words in their little virgin voices
They were playing with the sand imagining and creating things which was never there
I talked to a small cat hoping that he will understand me
As the night fall deeper
I find myself feeling rather different
Feeling rather celebrative but quiet
I talked about a movie and a book that I kind of love
Although it is sadistic
I realise this post is kind of long
I will still go on
As we landed ourself on the jetty
We slack and kill sometime
Before we proceed to Mcdonald's
To have our post-midnight meal
I was forcing myself to eat
Head down to the stone place
To watch the sunrise
Napped there like a baby until someone nonsensically
Talked in pure mandarin and talk crap
Hilarious indeed
Then there were cockroach
And we shifted to this lovely shelter
Where I continue napping despite the pirate and UK robots talks
Sent Quin off
And thought of waiting for sunrise
But did not
Head back home
Goodbye sweet old day

Left of the night

2009-08-28T11:12:00.000+08:00

We can only take so much
The last thing I want to do is getting drunk on the fasting month
Going to stone the night with my Support System
I wonder what we will do
Let the night worry for itself
Before we turn to stone
Migraine is getting the best of me
Having an interview later
Going to tear the motherfucking house down
In the Barbecue
I know we're All the same

I won't let you win

2009-08-27T21:29:00.001+08:00

It was suppose to be a nice day
Turned out to be a bad day
But having you -thoning
Makes me smile the widest today
It means that I have someone to bully besides Quin
It means that I have someone to do daft actions with besides Haiqal
It means that I have someone to argue with besides Iris
But it also means a hell of a painful time
Motherfucker!
I be heading down for job interview tomorrow
Cousin already got the deal
It means I too can do it
I miss my cat's presence
Everything is turning inside out upside down diagonally opposite and horizontally opposite
Everything is a mess
I need to breathe
I may look like the kid who has everything
But it is the most simplest thing that I do not have
Give me all the material stuff you can find
It still do not make me happy
Well maybe awhile
But not for long

You absent yourself out of my life since I was 12 years old
You think I am fine
But I am dying
It is like your bestfriend accidentally punch you
Although it hurts so bad
You still say "I'm fine, don't worry!"
You are suppose to be the closest
But your presence and absence do not mean a thing to me
Unless you are always there for me

Tomorrow comes Today

2009-08-27T21:19:00.000+08:00

I just want everyone to know that
Blogger is too giving me a spin on my head
But just that I think I get the hang of codes
And all
As you know my codes are not that complicated
I bet a two-year old can be taught doing this perfectly
That if they have the same fucking developed brain as mine
I resort to listening to Gorillaz today
Brings back the "Stone" age
Aunt have brought up a bittersweet memory
I felt uncomfortable
I nearly stopped eating
And head back to my room
I am super pissed off with her
Trying her best to make everything alright for me
When at the beginning
Fuck it man!

Summer ends, its time for anew

2009-08-26T23:31:00.000+08:00

As photographs turns yellow
And fades into a blur
We still have our film rolls
Which we have burnt
Years before today
I wish I never run
I wish I never avoid
I could be someone
It is worth taking

When to watch The Proposal
Straight up, I did not like it
The humor was fresh and funny
But the plot was somehow predicted
I like surprises
Well this movie
Is no surprise
Wend wasting time in arcade
Playing air hockey
Which I sucked
Playing Shooting game
Playing Dance Dance Revolution
Playing Metal Slug II
I never thought arcade is a good use to kill time
Head down to MakanSutra
Tasted their seafood and satays
Was kind of worth it
But I tasted better foods
At the same price
I stoned
Again
Like how I used to
I feel so yesterday
I do not want to be the person I was
No
I would not

I wonder

2009-08-25T23:52:00.000+08:00

UT is finally over motherfuckers!
Next is to look forward to new class
Thank you Fatin for the short message
Very thoughtful
I hope will be able to see you during the barbecue
We kind of slack in class waiting for the time to pass by
I felt that I vent a lot of anger on the wall and the WALL
Yes I repeated it twice
Who cares
Sometimes we do stupid things not realising how stupid it would turn out to be
But at the end of the day
It is for the fun of it
Editing musics for my showcase
Kind of screwed
I liked the down beat
Chill-Lax music
But they like Hot music
Just accommodate
Besides, it is easier to dance to as compared
Learnt how to freeze and hand stand today
My knees are kind of abused
Thank you mother for giving me knee
Thank you god

As time goes by
Life shortens
Would you ever turn back realising
What you could have done better
If I could I would

I realised

2009-08-24T20:40:00.000+08:00

Different minds
May come up with similar ideas
Shaped in a distinct figure
To identify
One from the other
I do not know why

After UT we went Mcdonald's
It was not my first time disciplining myself not to eat
So it was okay
I was quite shock that our dear friend did not eat
Kind of tempted to eat
But what the hell
Spotted some covered Muslim ladies
They were happily eating despite knowing that I looked
I am shocked indeed
Represent motherfuckers..
I know you may have your unfertilised egg out from your vaginas
But please have some respect
Represent!
If you want to eat
Take of the scarf from your filthy head.

I was quite tickled
By the act of other stupid, I shall say, humans
If I were to come out with gossiping 101
I could actually educate them
But I would not know if their mind were able to take it
If one were to tell something about someone in the near distant
Please...
DO NOT!
Turn straight away
Let everyone turn in unison
Look at them while talking
I am deeply amused
Seriously that guy look like my grandfather
Only with eyebrow piercing
I once thought that eyebrow piercing is cool
Now I know
He uglified the god damn fashion
Thanks man, you really made my day
Made my day into a living nightmare!
Well only for a few seconds
Nitwit!

Pastries!

2009-08-23T22:11:00.000+08:00

Aunt and Sister made cookies today!
I fucking love my sister White Rocher!
It is fucking nice!
My new favorite.
Anyway
Thought of discussing with my fellow team mates on the showcase
It appears that my message was not clear
I do not know what is not clear about my fucking message
But I love the fact that I got a lot of time in my hand
Either way
I ended up Love Movie Marathon with my sister
I ended up standing straight to my beliefs
Well
I am just going to shut it down for today
Kind of full after the break of fast
Till then losers...

Maybe....

2009-08-23T21:55:00.000+08:00

I wonder why is it so hard to define love
I movie marathon-ed love stories with sister
And I do not quite get it
Is love physical?
Is love about lust?
Is love about understanding?
Or is love everything?
I believe that strong emotions make one feel love
But how would you know that Love is not tentative
Movies always end when it is epic and predicted
They got married
And it ends there
What happens after that?
They never show
Do they get divorced?
Do they have their LOVE for each other fading?
A relationship does not happen because of LOVE...
A relationship happens because you care deeply with whatever is going on with that one person
Their feeling, their day and everything else
You are in love because your heart beats faster whenever you see them
Well it is not Love, it is getting nervous and excited
I just don't like the thought of LOVE.
Why are you getting married to her?
"Oh well, because I love her!"
NOT VALID!
It is because that you know that she is the one.
The one you are able to spend your life with.
The one you care most.
The one whom care for you the most.
The one you enjoy spending time with.

You can find love absent in the ones you so called "love".
But you cannot stop caring for the one you care.

It my opinion
Do not like it
Go jump of the building.

I find it

2009-08-22T22:45:00.001+08:00

This is why Im Hot - Shark

I am so glad that fasting starts today
I do not know why
But I like to fast
Well...
To be more specific
I like the fasting period
Fasting = GOOD FOOD!
I am in dilemma
But I like it
Did nothing much today
I thought I would go out to catch a movie
But too bad...
She is not free
Besides, there are no perfect movie to watch
I would not watch those
"OH SO DREAMY LOVE MOVIES"
Especially with her
I was amazed by the number of things that I can do in one whole perfect day
I feel satisfied
I was looking for songs for the Showcase
And ended up mixing songs instead
Lame ass Black Boy!
Fuck the Tranny!
Ya so sexy.
Sexy fuck Babe!
Just forgot to put that in the posts...

Where is the love?

2009-08-21T21:48:00.001+08:00

Today was a damp day I shall say
When it gets cold
I am happy
As it gets colder
I am happier
I love to feel as though I am freezing
Shivering down was so hilarious
I felt like going cold turkey once again
Only that this time is without the stomach cramps, nauseous or runny nose
I shall say that it is going well day by day
Everything is dying down
I know deep down
You are just being professional
Although I have my DIS
I shall just let you save your wild emotions
I am kind of scared of my Freshies' Showcase
Despite that I am looking forward to it
I do not know a lot of them
I just can hope for the best
We going back to the streets where we originated from

Please do not type loudly
Because I may just type louder
And disrupt everyone

So what now?

2009-08-20T21:21:00.000+08:00

Well...
I felt that UT can be neglected
Like seriously
Eyes were on me
Making me feel like I have greens on my teeth
Then I found out
Well..
Too bad so sad
I felt unusually different
It was a weird feeling
I know that some are curious
I would not even bother
So long as I know
That is all that matters
Then when UT ended
Lunch at banquet
A time of bomb
I felt like I exploded with offensive words
That describes
Super lazy to blog the little details
I hate to blog about you
But you made me blog about you
By the way
I was not blogging about you until you blog about me
Stop eating sambal please.

Biggest Loser

2009-08-20T18:08:00.000+08:00

Some things were not describable
How happy I am
Call me a heartless
Call me an asshole
I was basically rolling my eyes 1000 times
Knowing that each of them will in the end
Will do the same thing to each other
How real can a fake get?
I can tell that you have no reasons
No acceptable reasons
But it is okay
Look around you
What makes you think that they would not do the same to you
Because you are close?
Keep your friends close enemies closer
Ever heard of it?
Do not show now darling
Only time will allow
The closer you get
The harder you fall
As for the BOOBIES
I doubt they are as fake
Because they are not in mask
Or neither can they fly

Something to think about my sneaky little kittens
You make Karma more exciting

A month is too short

2009-08-19T22:10:00.000+08:00

I was kind of late for UT today
Rushed the whole test
I did not regret not studying
Because I know that
If I were to study
I still will not know how to answer the questions
Fucking tricky
I have decided not to be in MASK!
Get real
The UT was kind of screwed
Although I like the fact that there was no jam
Not going to study for science
Because I know it is a confirm fail
Met Iris after school
I miss talking to you
Civic Plaza Starbucks Sucks
In my absolute opinion
I hope I would not be tempted to drink again
It has been awhile since I touched that bottle
A friend of mine choke on her tongue
It was a bad sight...

A GAY POST

2009-08-18T23:26:00.002+08:00

No matter what....
I know for sure
Our friendship will last
The reason for me to smile everyday
Is you...
Seok Hui, Iris, Haiqal, Mastura, Darshene, Hui Tin, Quin
What I love about you guys:
I love your mind(dirty mind)
Your understanding is what defines you
You are more than a friend to me, like a sibling
You made me feel happy whenever you speak
You are a great friend, Bestfriend.
I shall end here as I hate the emotional part.
IRIS!
I already miss you like crazy!
I would not want to imagine what it would be like if you are already in foreign land

I won't say goodbye
As I hate to untangle the knot we tied so tightly
It seem almost impossible to break
Can I hold on to everyone and never let go?
I never felt this way before
I hate to say it
I .... YOU!
Fill in the blanks with your imagination

I like it

2009-08-16T19:46:00.000+08:00

Another fresh day
Thanks for hearing all my bad language rantings
I really need you
Seriously owe you one
Watched Orphan
That show is fucking screwed man!
Screwed in a good way
I love the killing part
The never ending stabbing of one till he dies
Is like mere orgasm!
Fuck!
If that was legal
I want to fucking kill
It felt so good imagining
KFC Krushers is a lower graded Mcdonald's Milkshakes
I felt that bubble tea is way better
I felt that....
I am just doing what I do
I like it
And I do what I like
Then you do what I like
Then you like it
Total copycat

18 Wheeler

2009-08-16T13:39:00.000+08:00

Hey, hey, girl! What's your problem?
I see you trying to hurt me bad
Don't know what you're up against
Maybe you should reconsider
Come up with another plan
Cause you know I'm not that kinda guy
That will lay there and let you come first

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

Hey, hey, girl! Are you ready for today?
You got your shield and sword?
Cause its time to play the games
You are beautiful
Even though you are not for sure
Don't let him pull you by the scar
You're gonna get your feelings hurt

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

Everywhere that I go
There's someone waiting to chain me
Everything that I say
There's someone trying to short-change me
I am only this way
Because of what you have made me
And I'm not gonna break!

You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down

No More

2009-08-15T22:44:00.000+08:00

Got a haircut today
Not going to rant the same old shit again
I find that there is no need to entertain those swarming bees
That will be the last you ever fucking heard from me
I tried to afresh my day
Saw Alin at Far East
Kind of mortified
As I was alone
I was looking for some alone time and scouting for places
Ideal places for some Arty Farty pictures
In town
Window-shopped a bit
Setting my target on how much to save for next shopping spree
I am losing my appetite nowadays
I think that I have diabetes
But I hope not
I promised myself

It all seemed so clear now

2009-08-15T13:42:00.002+08:00

I just want to say thank you
Thank you for letting me know
Now I know.....
The crystals may fool the eyes of the diamonds
But I am no diamond
I thank secondary school
Thank you for making me more observant
Now I can differentiate the actors
From the cast
Lets converse through our posts.
Hannah, don't be fooled
You are strong
Get a backbone already
Stand for your own beliefs
I am tired of pretending
Only for you, Hannah.
And Ain....
I do not know when it started.
It felt as though you were the one.
Thank you

I do not know

2009-08-15T00:08:00.003+08:00

Seeds starts to root
Absorbing every nutrient there are to supply
As the hands ticks
Turgid as the stem would be of the nutrients
Branching every dimension of itself
Grow as much leaves to support itself
You look in fine fettle
Days goes as hours goes by
You wilt out of the blue
Was the soil not fertile for you?
Did the pests drain the nutrient away?
I try to revive you
But it is pointless
For you are already deaf
Deaf and dead

Well...
Are you the cause for us to wilt?
I am sure it is partly me.
Only time, we will know
Until now you know you are.
Thanks for the experience
I am nothing but a journalist who writes every moment that I observe clearly.
What I see is what I get.

Keep me High

2009-08-14T21:38:00.000+08:00

Draining the brain cells in my head today.
Science was fucking difficult
I felt like leaving class
But in the end did not
I am so fucked up
I would not be a 2 faced bastard
Hate means hate already
I am sick of tired to pretend everything is fine between us when we both know we hate each other
Lets get real everyone
I am sick of talking to people who acts
Get real with me
If you hate say it loud say it proud
For all you know
You are not the only one
Well...
I am obnoxious, direct and too good to be true
I realised that we do not realise how good of a friend is until they leave
I missed Iris
I want to pull her back in and make her stay
But we know she could not
PLANES PLANES PLANES!
Please eh!
Don't leave us!
I want to draw line!
Watched G.I. Joe Today.
I got to commend on myself hehehehe

I am not like you

2009-08-13T22:20:00.000+08:00

Lesson was fine today
Got to know that our class was ranked #1 for the Communication UT2
Was quite happy with the ranking
Nevertheless
I am also please with my UT2 results.
Communication: A
Enterprise: A
Mathematics: B
Cognitive: A
Science: C+

I felt that it was just luck
I thought I was going to flunk the UT2
Because I did not study.

More shows are coming up
Excited!
Some things that happened today made me sad
You may dis me now
I will just pray hard for god to change you
And god will not change you overnight
He will teach you a lesson
A lesson you will never forget
So that you will feel what I felt
And that you will not repeat the same mistake again

Sorry Darshini...
If you are hurt...
You can "FUCK" me anytime...

Talk about me Talk about yourself

2009-08-13T08:44:00.000+08:00

Talking about how your life is ruined by others' talking about you
But you yourself talk about others
Humans cannot live without talking about another
Be it good or bad
Either way
It does not hurt the victim
It entertains the victim
On how people look at them
Make us harder faster better stronger
Daft punk makes my day!
Why you cannot say it straight to my face DARLING?

They Cry and they POOP and they CRY and they PUKE!

2009-08-12T22:56:00.001+08:00

Today was a non-productive day.
I felt more stupid than ever.
My team scored the lowest and my score for today is the lowest.
Still enjoy the day with my best butts.
I was contemplating whether to go Hip Hop or not cause I have weird tummy pain.
Obviously I go.
Because I am a good kid and passionate dancer.
But I felt that it was a waste of my time.
We are just learning Up and Down Bounce AGAIN!
But more intricate.
The head banging make me nausea.
I realise I dance to much focusing on my chest.
Should relax more.
Apparently I felt like I dance like a weird dancer.
I am not that good okay.
They say that I am blur.
Only time will tell.
In the bus on the way home.
There is this baby who puked in the bus.
The father just pressed the bell and stopped the bus.
And rushed off without cleaning the mess.
And guess what?
It was only the 1st minute since the bus started moving from the interchange.
It was god damn smelly.
Like flour plus condensed milk plus butter and some overdue rice.
Yes I saw the chunks
It is rice chunks.
Too bad no photo.
I thought it will be too disgusting

Dearly Beloved

2009-08-12T08:26:00.003+08:00

A seat of two is meant for two
A seat for one is meant for one
If you prefer to occupy 2 seats
Please
Put your scrotum at the other seat so that the unborn child gets to sit
Not me
Am totally pissed by Motherfuckers in the bus who acts like their testicles are so melon-like
That they spread their legs like I am about to fucking fuck them
Please
Be considerate
Yes!
This is for those Uncivilised veterans and soon to be veterans.
Go get your brains developed...
Is consideration for others not thought by your parents?
Or were you busy fucking to even care about consideration?

Looking at Looking at Looking at ME!

2009-08-11T19:21:00.000+08:00

I must say that today got my juices falling on empty.
My creative juices almost ran dry.
I my brain hurts from too much thinking and creating.
I ate apple crumble which tasted
OKAY...
I felt that OBS apple crumble was way better.
I remembered that time when I crashed to Mujahid's team looking for food.
LOSER!
Good thing they were kind enough as to provide me good food.
Compared to my team who claim they are F&N student when they cook like
WHAT THE FUCK!
Talking about food.
I skipped Hip Hop B-Boying Class today as I was having this feeling of wanting to vomit.
I ate food.
Then I feel like vomiting.
The food was well.
But just that I felt like primary 1 again.
When I puke every time I eat.
I know for sure it is not gastric.
But for what every reason.
Please do not start again.
I do not mind if I have money.
Well...
Vomiting = Empty stomach AGAIN!

Probably....

2009-08-10T19:31:00.000+08:00

Canceled some outing due to the most obvious reason.
Well...
The main reason was they cannot make it.
So why dread...
Probably going to watch G.I Joe some other time.
Well... Soon.
Thought of catching Orphan.
Went grocery shopping, karaoke and eating.
I bought this one baby cologne that I am addicted to.
You guessed it.
Sniffing it for every few minutes.
I mean if I can gulp it down...
I question how many bottles I have to buy.
Despite that...
I am most irritated by control queens
Like seriously.
Not everything have to go your way.
I something does not go your way....
Run along with it.
Roll eyes.
Give attitude.
Convince people.
Go home!
Do something about your life.

Excited.

2009-08-09T22:49:00.000+08:00

Well I am super excited for my Junior Showcase next Semester.
I have been trying out tuttings and foot works.
I am not the best there is to offer.
But I prefer dancing to studying for school.
I prefer dancing with unusual parts rather than just relying on precisions and feet.
I am sure nobody am interested in my ideas.
As it is ambitious.
Nevertheless.
I like to show what I have.
More like a show off.
But a closet show off I shall say.
Nothing much happened today.
When you have money...
You want to spend it all away on the most expensive things.
Well not realising the quality.
Besides that....
Happy birthday Singapore.
May we get more expensive so that it will seem normal being a homeless...

Lets see CREDIBLE!

2009-08-09T00:33:00.008+08:00

"Saturday, July 11, 2009"

"Past of Sophia"

"July and August will be the most unpredictable.
I do not know what it meant.
But I would just anticipate and foresee the future is dark."

Well I sure do know what it meant.
Do you?
It does apply to me.
It does apply to everyone around me.
Choosing and giving out shoulders.
I find that the dream is a "prophecy"
Trying to show me something.
Thank you for enlightening my soul.
Although it just tell me what to expect on the months.

I will pretend....

2009-08-08T23:13:00.000+08:00

Well...
I am quite astonished by the actions of our citizens truly.
I took a train ride.
The most shocking thing is Nobody dares to sit beside me after this caucasion woman went off.
First I thought they are against me.
Then I think again.
Maybe it is her.
Then I think again.
Maybe its the seat.
Then I looked at the seat.
There was this white stain on it.
I do not know where it came from neither do I know who stained it.
Well...
Nobody ended up sitting beside me except on my right that is my sister.
Then my cousin's wedding was a totally hole in the wallet.
It was nice.
But I question the motive.
I mean if you want a big wedding.
Book a hotel.
Watched Hangover.
Sister was kind of talking about love to me.
Well sorry.
Ain't buying it.
I am going to pretend I believe.
I do not want to change nobody minds.
Nor do I want a deep conversation about it.
Tired you know.
Maybe I am wrong.
Maybe you are wrong.
Only time will tell.

KELLY! KELLY! KELLY!

2009-08-07T22:24:00.001+08:00

Friends always makes me happy.
Even though they hurt me sometimes.
I will still smile as I daze upon the day.
Happy Birthday Kelly.
I went into the wrong classroom today.
The best part is I saw hints but never bothered to take note of.
Slacked again.
Ended up drawing the whole board.
Everything seem to turn out to be OK!
Except when attending the IG meeting.
Fuck the president.
Hip Hop is Family.
Not a requirement.
If you do not understand the beat.
Turn you black ass around and keep walking.
Walk till your pants drop with everyone laughing at your puny behind!
I am amazed on how much influence I give to people.
I am sorry.
But if you want to adopt my way of life.
I am sorry you cannot.
It is not as simple as you think it is.
It is complicated at the simplest thing
It may look easy.
But believe me....

Got to!

2009-08-07T08:20:00.000+08:00

I wish I got a Baygon Spray.
So that I can spray it to the pesty eyes.
Which are always observing me.
I am not perfect.
Neither am I that too fucked up.
I am just humans.
Stop trying to dig every detail of me.
Or soon you will find me thinking
That you are stalking me.
Before you dig my a hole for my grave.
Do you even have a hole to bury yourself in.
You know me.
Do you even know yourself?